“It’s the same color as your eyes, Mommy!” cried my little girl when I showed her our new sapphire-blue three-door coupe.

When I opened the small third door for her to see, she climbed in and shrieked, “My own door! Can we go for a ride? Please Mommy?”

Clipping down the highway at 70 mph, I felt a freedom I hadn’t felt since my divorce. I was proud of my new car. It made me feel independent and proved my ability to provide for myself—and my daughter—without a man. I’d given up on men. In fact, I kind of liked the idea that it would be difficult for an average-sized man to fit in our car. I decided if a man couldn’t fit in our car, he couldn’t fit in our lives.

As if reading my thoughts, my daughter cried, “This is a girl-car, Mommy!” She exploded into giggles, which turned into the kind of belly laughter only kids can understand. I joined in.

“We’re just two chicks in our car,” I said.

“It’s a Chick Car!” she cried.

That’s how my little car was named and we spent the next two years flying around (within the speed limit most of the time) in our Chick Car. When someone teased that a man couldn’t possibly fit comfortably in it, I would laugh and say that was why I liked it so much.

You might be surprised to learn that I eventually decided to marry a man who had to fold himself in half to squeeze into the car. I figure it’s a good reminder to him that I still have one space that is mine.

Whoa! The selfishness of that statement! The pride. The narcissism. Being single definitely brought out my independence. Even after marriage, some people who are set in their ways are prone to continuing alone, leaving their spouses out of their lives. I’m a perfect example of that danger.

My coupe turned into a protective shell surrounding something I was afraid of losing. It wasn’t the car I feared losing, it was me. I had my own “Chick Coupe” and no rooster was getting into it. He would just have to wait until I came out.

All men tire of waiting at some point, and mine did too. So, he suggested I trade the Chick Car in for something our whole family could fit into. But I’d started to view my car as mine and not as a blessing from God. I’d given in to vanity and felt that I, alone, was responsible for not only being able to buy my new car, but for being able to make it alone as a single mom. I thought I was managing great alone. My car was dependable and for a single mom with a young daughter, it was functional and practical—perfect for a mom who thought she had it all together.

The ending to this story would be wrapped up nicely if I said we finally traded in the Chick Car for a mini-van, but that’s not exactly what happened. Through God’s grace, I finally realized I was mired in pride about my car. I eventually admitted this to my husband, who patiently listened without letting on that he and the rest of the world had already figured that out.

By acknowledging my own pride, I finally opened the door for us to have a sensible discussion about the Chick Car. Setting emotions aside, we were able to work through various logistical and financial practicalities concerning family transportation. Eventually my husband, who has a God-given talent for managing our finances, explained that we might be better served to keep the Chick Car after all—for now.

We’re keeping it for now! I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t happy about that, but I continually have to guard myself against prideful emotions. I’ve realized my car isn’t my identity. I finally figured out that giving up some of my independence is not synonymous with giving up my individuality. My patient husband married me, not for my car—he can’t fit into it anyway—but to share a life with our children and me.

It’s still a cute ride, but it’s not about the car anymore. It’s about opening up and trusting my Heavenly Father to take care of me. It’s also about letting my husband take care of me and knowing he still respects my individuality.

I can now accept that he respects my capabilities, even admires them, but wants to make my load a little lighter than it was when I was single. Our husbands have a God-given desire and a responsibility to lighten our loads. Why not let them honor us by doing so? As for me, there’s a pretty sharp-looking rooster who’s been looking to do just that.

TINA ANN FORKNER is a freelance writer and novelist who recently sold her first fiction novel, Ruby Among Us, to be released soon.  (Story can also be read at this site: http://ag.org/dev/wtonline/relationships/istilldo/flying_coupe.cfm)

Service Times and Directions

• Focus Groups meet throughout the week

• The Sunday Celebration begins at 10:30 AM

• Cheyenne Berean Church is located at 5716 Powderhouse Road

• Cheyenne Berean Church is a non-denominational Bible church that is committed to meeting the contemporary spiritual needs of families and individuals in and around the Cheyenne, Wyoming area. We are a church with direction that is courageously building a safe place to grow in Christ. We are intentionally seeking to create a church family where we model faith, grace, and mutual submission as we affirm each other's unique gifts and strengths.

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